I've literally just gulped before I start typing on this blank canvas.
In recent months, I have heard people around me telling me that they are not happy and that they feel empty and somehow, they think they are very much alone in this. We aren't. I'm told I'm innately quite an optimistic and resilient character but I have had my dark days and moments.
I have no magic formula. Everyone has their own coping mechanism.
For myself, it is cry, cry, cry, write, write, write, bend, bend, bend, walk, walk, walk, talk, talk, talk and then laugh, laugh, laugh. For importantly, don't run away from the dark moments and don't be afraid to reach out and seek help.
Sit with your feelings and tell yourself it is ok not to be ok.
This is an extremely difficult topic to write. My heart is pounding quite hard. I have no idea how this will turn out. This is unlike our usual musings about self-improvement and productivity hacks. It is about something that I know people around me are facing and I might even have brushed shoulders with.
***
Have you ever felt like you might be depressed or deeply unhappy?
People think that depression is a big word -- taboo, intense and distant.
I read this and it is leading to this spiralling of thoughts.
In university, I made a presentation about journaling in Corporate Communications 101 class. I advocated journaling because I have identified it as a way to help me remember crucial events and moments -- happy, sad and funny. One of the examples I gave was how I actually captured a tragic story that happened and the lessons that taught me in my journal. Someone I knew ended his life. I choked slightly when I talked about that incident.
My presentation received very mixed reviews. Classmates came up to me, telling me that it was a great speech and presentation - they were moved and they felt like crying. My professor gave me a B+. She struggled to explain why she gave me that result but it was something to the effect that it might have been too emotional or intense.
"Is it? But this is REAL", I wanted to stand up for my views. (i was an innocent kid then otherwise it would have been"this is FUCKING REAL").
I did not raise my voice or protest, of course. I slithered away, feeling disappointed. That was the moment I realise people are uncomfortable with confronting sad things, imperfection and confusion. They don't want to talk about it or hear about it.
This gets amplified on our social channels - places where we construct our self-identities. No, there is nothing wrong with building an image for yourself. Sometimes, yes, we just want to capture the beautiful and significant moments in our lives through photos. Those are real moments as well.
Yet don't you often catch yourselves expressing Instagram envy?
No one's life is perfect. That's the utter truth.
We see the gorgeous couple in the perfectly manicured Instagram shot looking like they are so bloody in love - the girl with the tousled locks kisses the boy with the sparkling blue eyes - but when was the last time they shared a good, ol' emotional hug?
"Everyone presents an edited version of life on social media. People share moments that reflect an ideal life, an ideal self. And all that we are consuming are but carefully curated half-truths that perhaps, we all take too seriously." - ESPN on #LifeUnfiltered
In recent months, I have heard people around me telling me that they are not happy and that they feel empty and somehow, they think they are very much alone in this. We aren't. I'm told I'm innately quite an optimistic and resilient character but I have had my dark days and moments.
I have no magic formula. Everyone has their own coping mechanism.
For myself, it is cry, cry, cry, write, write, write, bend, bend, bend, walk, walk, walk, talk, talk, talk and then laugh, laugh, laugh. For importantly, don't run away from the dark moments and don't be afraid to reach out and seek help.
Sit with your feelings and tell yourself it is ok not to be ok.
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