(MON)DAY #9 Thanks

I turned 27 last Sunday. My celebration was low-key - good food with good company. Yet the realisation that I'm undeniably in my late 20s has made me feel a little anxious; when I was 21, I had an image of what I would be and have at age 27. These days I find myself quite focused on righting what I don't have together and getting stressed about how far away I am from what I think I should be.

Thankfully, I have good friends. One of them gave me a gift - a gratitude journal.

My Gratitude Journal (Thanks to @rynthemean)

The practice of keeping a gratitude journal isn't new - Oprah's been doing it for years - and easy to understand. The rationale: keeping record of things that you're grateful for, forces you to make a conscious effort to appreciate the positives in your lives. It's a reminder that things aren't all gloom and doom and that there are others out there who contribute to your life and happiness.

From Oprah.com

I'm not really sure how this will work for me, but I've decided to give it a go, starting with one of my favourite things in the world - food.

As I penned down some of my favourite dishes, I genuinely did feel a little less blue about the weekend ending. I felt thankful for having experienced these gastronomical treats and I savoured memories of my first visit to Meat Liquor in the UK (happy to report they'll be opening up in Singapore this month and I've an entire cookbook of their recipes to try), evening dinners when my mother made delicious oxtail stew, and the joy of chocolate...

If you're interested in getting started on a gratitude journal, here are some of the best practices that may help you reap the most rewards:

1. Make a conscious decision to be happier and grateful. You shouldn't be listing these things down just for the sake of it.
2. The longest list doesn't win. It's not a contest where the person that has the longest list wins. Listing down 1 or 3 things that ring true and deep is better than 10. 
3. Not all things are equally impactful. Apparently, focusing on people to whom you're grateful is better than focusing on things, and unexpected surprises (good ones of course) tend to result in stronger levels of gratitude. 
4. No stress, you don't have to do it every day. Once or twice a week works just as well, since you're less likely to 'burn out'. 

The journal I received has a bunch of lists you can complete or empty pages for you to write freely. You can get something similar from Kikki.K here. Alternatively, just grab an empty notebook and start!

For those who prefer something digital, you can try out an online gratitude journal Thnx4 by the UC Berkeley Greater Good Science Center. It comes with email reminders and you have the option of keeping it all private. You should know that using Thnx4 means that the data you provide may be used by the centre in their research on social and emotional well-being, which hopefully means more tips and tools for the rest of us to lead happier lives. Participation is voluntary and your data is kept anonymous, but you can opt out at any time!

Not for you? Then maybe try out mobile app Get Gratitude (available for $1.99 on the App Store)  or Happier (free for download here on the Play Store).

Fingers crossed on giving thanks!

(MON)DAY #8: A half-read book is a half-finished love affair.

“A half-read book is a half-finished love affair."

- David Mitchell, Cloud Atlas

This year, I set a simple goal for myself – stop accumulating, start completing.

This is my stack of half-finished books and oh, to add on to that, I bought a Kindle last year (or was it the year before?) Did I fully utilise my Kindle? No, in fact, it is lying sadly on my desk - pitiful little electronic thing that has now run out of battery life. (I love it; it is a nifty little thing. It can't replace good ol' books though.) 

Outside work, I have plenty of interests -- outside the sphere of control, that's when I go haywire. Sometimes I get distracted by new ideas that spring up in my head and will somehow not be able to see to the end of some side projects that I have conceptualised. 

I set a few guidelines for myself.... 

1. I try not to buy new stuff, or sign onto the new 'activities'. Every time I am tempted to do so, I will question myself, will this add to the clutter in my room (which could potentially mean inner clutter as well)? If yes, then I won't subscribe to it. 

2. Do I really need to make this trip? It is so easy to decide to spend some money and make an escapade, but do I really, really need it? Will it add to my anxiety when I realise I have overspent? I love travelling, but as I have written before, travelling is a mindset. 

3. Start a bullet journal. The task list gets daunting and it stays. So it will leave you with no choice, but to tackle them. 

4. De-clutter everything and everywhere. I admit, this is still a work-in-progress. No, you don't get a view of my room. 

5. Finish all my books and stop buying new ones (The latter is really hard to keep to. I mean... how can I resist? What I do to manage and reconcile this desire to buy books, is to read the new books first and complete them!)

6. Think you are a perfectionist?  Ignore that, stop putting yourself on a pedestal.  Learn to let go. 

7. Ruminate less... According to a Fast Company article, a lot of times, we are ruminating over failures, and we let negativity overwhelm us and that stalls our progress. For me, in particular, I ruminate over the ideal of the task completion way too much than the actual execution. It is akin to a scenario of a kid thumbing through the pages of the textbook to see how much more he/she has left to go before the chapter is completed.  So, simply start doing. 

8. Work with people / surround yourself with people and friends who are the complete opposite of that; they are sticklers for deadlines and timelines and are just unbelievably disciplined. 

Yes! I'm done with the blogpost. One task off the checklist! I can sleep more soundly tonight. ;) 

P/S: That said, some things and affairs are not meant to be completed. If they suck, they suck.

(MON)DAY #7: Don't Buy That Bag, Buy Time Instead

A friend of mine recently quit her job. Her reasons were unique to her situation: overworked, underpaid and unsatisfied with her work culture and environment, she felt she didn't have the time and energy to focus on things she did want to do - learn something new, live a healthier life. She decided to take a hiatus to achieve those things for herself.

Practical as always, I asked how she managed it. Being without income is a nervewrecking prospect and she probably sensed that in my question.

What she said gave me great food for thought.

I couldn't find a reason to argue with that.  

It's interesting that we are ever so ready to part with our cash for material things - bags and shoes - or even to travel and find temporary escape from our lives, but less willing to spend money to buy ourselves time to build upon ourselves and our lives.

More than anything else, time is something we only have less of as we grow older, so it would seem a more precious commodity than anything material.

I've fallen in love with the idea of time as something to invest or to invest in, so that every day counts towards building a life that I wake up loving and excited about. As I turn 27 this weekend, I am more aware than ever of my desire to build a life I won't want to escape from.

It can manifest in the more 'extreme' form of quitting your job, or a milder version like taking a short sabbatical.

For me, I'm taking baby steps.

Every weekend, I make an effort to invest time in my future. I spend time researching ideas I have to see if any of them have legs. I've made plans to start a Coursera course to learn more about branding and digital.

Each month, I resolve to save up resources so that one day, buying time can be an option.

Maybe next time you think about buying something for yourself, as retail therapy, you can consider buying time for yourself instead.

P.S. Coursera is a platform that partners with top universities around the globe, offering courses on everything from coding to history, for free. Check out what courses they have available here. 

(MON)DAY #6: Walk a mile

I loved walking aimlessly when I was travelling in Europe. Sometimes I was taking in the sights on my own, scrolls of words running through my mind as the wordsmith in me conjured up yet another imaginary conversation or tale. Sometimes, I could just be spacing out while I studied the tree, the sky, and the people and wondered what their stories were. When I wasn't taking my solitary walks, exploring a new place or old familiar grounds with a partner-in-crime gave me equal satisfaction.

About two years ago, a friend of mine continued her walking hobby in Singapore. She would alight a couple of bus stops before her destination and walk. Inspired by her, I decided to keep up with walking even in Singapore and to make an effort to discover little gems that we have otherwise turned a blind eye to.

This has slowly become second nature for me. Last Saturday, I had some time before dinner with a friend. Instead of staying another hour in a cafe with no book and a laptop with a flat battery, I chose to take a slow and leisurely walk from Tanjong Katong road to Joo Chiat road. I am an adopted Eastie having studied in schools that are located in the East side of Singapore, so I'm familiar with some of the landmarks in the area, but I have never, never taken a serious look at the environment or the people who dwell in the area. You'll be surprised how much more you see when you start to slow down and walk... I feel free, creative and happy. It is as simple as that.

If you are up for a challenge, and will like to become a 'heavyweight' walker, take a leaf from SG Walking Routes . My friend and I covered a route from the blog before, with quite a bit of adaptation.

Who says Singapore is boring! This is kind of our second walk together. (The first one at Sungei Buloh was a warm-up) We discovered charming hidden gems during our walk from Clementi to Hort Park ー a whole lot of forsaken HDB flats in Clementi, lovely colonial black and white houses along Maidenstone Road, the slightly dilapidated colonial apartment buildings with queer names situated along Woking Road in the quiet and peaceful Wessex Estate, away from the chaos of the city, the waft of jackfruits drifting to our noses as we scaled the stairs in Kent Ridge Park and meeting a fellow walking enthusiast who shared with us his route! Thanks to SG Walking Route blog! I feel like I am backpacking in Singapore! #exploresg #theroomtraveller #weekendishere #woking #dover #hortpark #remembersingapore #heritagetrail #travel #keepwalking

A video posted by Siying Goh (@siying) on Nov 24, 2013 at 7:51am PST

Danish philosopher, Soren Kierkegarrd, said, "Above all, do not lose your desire to walk. Every day I walk myself into a state of well-being and walk away from every illness. I have walked myself into a state of well-being and walk away from every illness. I have walked myself into best thoughts, and I know of no thought so burdensome that one cannot walk away from it."

So if you have a chance this week, start small. Take a walk in your neighbourhood instead of driving or taking a bus. If you are feeling more adventurous, venture into a town that you aren't familiar with, and just walk. Make pit-stops at cafes, bars or even your friends' void decks and...surprise them.

"I have walked all the way to see you."  That would have made a wicked line.

(MON)DAY #5 Keeping it Simple

Over the past 4 weeks, we've shared several wonderful things you can do to start the week on a great note - from Morning Pages, to Economist Espresso to Berlin Artparasites.

For the past couple of weeks, I've been reminded of our mortality and how precious our time is with our loved ones.
So this Monday, we're proposing to change gears, take it down a notch and keep it simple.

Maybe you miss somebody you love, maybe you haven't done something special for that person in a while. Or maybe you haven't told them how much you love them enough or in a long time. Do it today.

It can be something simple like a text message to brighten their morning.

It could be a bouquet of their favourite flowers like this 'Hello Monday' arrangement from independent florist Bloom Room.

It could be picking up their favourite ice cream on the way home from work.

It could be making plans for a special day together (you never realise how precious these days are till you're miles and oceans apart).

It could be as simple as a heartfelt "I love you".

Do it today. I promise it will be as rewarding for you as it is for them, and it'd certainly make your Monday a lot more interesting.

Leave us a note or comment to let us know how doing this made you feel! We'd love to know.

(MON)DAY #4 Our favourite art gallery on social media

"The sun is perfect and you woke this morning. You have enough language in your mouth to be understood. You have a name, and someone wants to call it. Five fingers on your hand and someone wants to hold it. If we just start there, every beautiful thing that has and will ever exist is possible. If we start there, everything, for a moment, is right in the world" - Warsan Shire

Source: Berlin-Artparasites

"This speaks to me," I shared a screenshot to my girlfriends as I laid on my bed, ruminating over a Facebook post from Berlin-Artparasites. 

Berlin-Artparasites was the discovery for me in 2014. I got to know about the page because Amanda Lee Koe shared one of its posts on her timeline. Ever since then, I am hooked. 

Source: Berlin-Artparasites

Last week, we introduced The Economist Espresso where you could get your daily dose of current and political affairs. 

Berlin-Artparasites, likewise, is where we think can help you stay in touch and connected with the world through the cacophony of experiences, emotions, joy and struggles depicted on the artworks and words. 

If you think this sounds fluffy and hyperbolic, try reading the posts. Berlin-Artparasites gives a voice to artworks, both known and unknown, by pairing them with quotes and excerpts from literary figures and popular culture influencers. So they are not a bit, I daresay, pretentious or high-brow. 

Curator of Artparasites, Jovanny Varele-Ferreya, remarked, "I'm also motivated by the superficiality/distractions that social media is seemingly pushing us towards; the pointless news articles in the media, the unimportant information so many of us share on this never-ending feed. I wanted to put something refreshing into that feed." 

I read the Facebook and Instagram posts religiously every morning the moment I wake up and before I sleep... And I don't feel guilty about it! I see them as nourishment for my soul and my tired bones especially after a long day of work. I admire the way the curators have matched the artworks with the words with empathy and sensitivity, while still maintaining the integrity of the works as much as they could. Every piece speaks to me or provokes my thoughts; this is art that anyone can comprehend and relate to. 

I may be an advocate of Berlin-Artparasites now, one day...perhaps, I hope I'll have the chance to be a contributor too.  (It's good to have dreams...) Its existence gives hope to budding artists and writers - your little seeds of inspiration and ideas carry no less empathetic power than famous works do on Artparasites.  There should be no boundaries to art; every piece can create a little stirring in one's heart. 

Bookmark them:

• Twitter: http://twitter.com/artparasites
• Tumblr: http://artparasitesreally.tumblr.com/
• Insta: http://instagram.com/artparasitesofficial
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/berlinartparasites

(Mon)day #3 A little shot of Espresso

“Are you being narcissistic again?”, says S.  

I cringe inside, even while my eyes remain glued to my phone, my thumbs gliding across the screen to scroll to the next pretty picture, and my mouth saying “Noooo…”.

But it’s true, I’m an #instaaddict.

It’s what I reach for on my morning commute to work, my coffee break, when I’m bored…

I derive pleasure and relaxation from double-tapping on a beautiful snapshot of a sunset,strong  #selfie game, #ootd and #foodporn. But what does that really do for my brain?

For the past week, I’ve made a small manageable commitment to wean myself (slightly) off Instagram. Instead, I’m dedicating that time and headspace every morning to knowledge, learning and understanding what’s going on in the world.

I’m doing that with The Economist Espresso.

It takes the time of your morning cuppa to read through, if not less.  It summarises the day’s current affairs - business, finance, politics and more - in a nice little shot, allowing me to keep my Monday or morning blues in perspective while learning about the world. It’s been an incredibly manageable ritual to intergrate into my morning routine and I’m hopeful that I’ll keep it up.

A paid subscription ($3.99 a month ) gives me seven fresh articles a day, five days a week from Monday to Friday and plenty of food for thought.

One small step away from Instagram, one small step towards nourishing my mind.

The Economist Espresso is available for download on the Google Play Store and the App Store.

If you’ve been using it, drop us a comment to let us know how you find it.

After your daily Espresso, you might also want to try out Morning Pages to put your emotions and thoughts onto paper.